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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Of being scared, of being afraid.

  • I fear leaving them behind. My daughters. I know one day we will all die, but if I can ask for one thing, please God, let me stay alive until they can take care of themselves.
  • I'm afraid of losing my mind. Really. You can never take your sanity for granted. What if I wake up one day and don't recognize them anymore? Oh My Goodness I can't imagine.
  • On a lighter note, I'm scared of wild animals and the dark. You combine those two together and you get a very scared Sasha. The last time we were at Night Safari here in Singapore, I refused to get down from the tram. Much to the dismay of my family. They wanted to walk around in the dark, looking out for nocturnals. Thankyouverymuch. I told them they can do so and I'll meet them at the entrance. Haha! In the end, they stayed put in the tram with me. I heard whispers - *next time we go without mommy*. LOL.

  • I need about 15 more packs of those Pebbles kraft alpha stickers. Love. :) Polaroid stamp from Cocoa Daisy. Stamped tag - I've had it forever, I think it was from an old Scarlet Lime kit. Stamped alphas - Studio G, also an old set. I love mine!
  • Added some handstitching (actually, no - I stitch first once I have the rough idea of how my layout is gonna be), Hambly tapes, KaiserCraft pearls and eyelets.
  • Almost 2am in Singapore. I ought to head to bed or I will be 'paying' for this for the next week. I'm a grandma, I usually sleep at 10. 11 the most. Ha!
xoxo

40 comments :

Chok Keun said...

Lovely LO, I love the stamped alphas too and nice combi of the washi tapes and how the pearls lead the eyes!

Kawi said...

I have award for you on my blog. I love you work since the first time i make scrapbooking.

Margrethe said...

This is beautiful, Sasha!

Mary Jo Rhoda said...

Beautiful layout, Sasha. If I wasn't on my phone I would pin it :)
You know I say this prayer all of the time. "God, please let my family grow old together. A long, healthy life." I hate to think of my children without me, or even more tragic, me without them!

Rebecca said...

lol - I'm often falling asleep by 9pm! :) You're no grandma! I totally understand your fears. I watched my grandma suffer from Altzheimer's , and forget who we were, and who my mom was. It was so sad. That's why I'm so fiercely adamant about my memory keeping. I want my books to be there if someday I forget. And I want them to be there to tell the stories to those I love if someday I become unable to tell them. I hope someday someone really cherishes what I've made, I know I already do! :) Love you, Sasha!!

Patricia said...

So beautiful! Love how you did that title and journaling...amazing! I'm with you...especially being an older Mom...I hope I'm alive enough that my daughter will be okay.

Carla said...

super cute page girl!

ClaireTet said...

Beautiful layouts and your fears are totally valid. My mother really worried about my baby ( then aged 31) sister when she was diagnosed with her terminal illness. My sister in law was 19 when both her ( and my husband's) parents died. The rest of your family will rally around and my hubby has such a close relationship with his sis as a result. Hopefullybthis wont be a concern for many many decades though!
On the Night Safari front though you are totally missing out. The bat enclosure is my fave but I do understand not everyone likes bats flying round their ears!

WillieburgScrapper said...

I LOVE the combinations you come up with Sasha! I will have to pout to Silhouette on my list because I really like everything I see people making with it. This page is beautiful and I agree wholeheartedly with your sentiment.
I must admit.. I would be crawling around in the dark to see the animals- I would be the person the tour operator would yell at for leaving the herd. Not brave- just foolish- especially when "on vacation". :) Curiosity might just kill this cat.

Brenda Weaver said...

love the layout! I have a stamp almost identical to that flower on the tag. You've reminded me to get it back out and use it again soon! Thanks for the lovely inspiration!

Blossom inch said...

Sasha...love your blog post as always, your story always make me smile and this layout is awesome! loving the stitching and you are not a grandma...you are a gorgeous and hot mommy! Please do blog again as I know I will be reading your story again and again! Have a great week my dear! Hugs

Jill said...

That is powerful stuff.

caroline hancock / Scrappercaz said...

beautiful layout, i have that stamp too and have yet to use it. and i worry too about dying and how Lucy would cope without me, she is my little shadow and wow it would be so hard :(

teacher jessy said...

Gosh I do think like you all the time. I am so afraid to lose Mr Handsome and my fur babies!! I will be in tears whenever I think about it. You are not alone :) That layout is just gorgeous. You can really stitch...

Donna said...

wow s, awesome.

Danielle Higginbottom-Brown said...

Gorgeous layout! And I love the tital/journaling

Jennifer said...

oh wow...I love that!! :)

Amy Coose said...

Gorgeous, my friend. And wow, on your fears...I can't even go there-causes me more anxiety than I can handle.

Valerie Bishop said...

You and I have the very same fears so I feel for you! What a fabulous page! I love he journaling with those fab Kraft letters nd your stitching!

kim said...

Oh my do I understand these fears! You just want to know they will be ok on their own right! Love the layout and that hambly washi is so cool.

Keshet said...

This is just beautiful, Sasha. And I can totally relate to those fears. Especially at about 3 in the morning.

Tara LeClaire said...

Your layout is beautiful. Striking, actually :)

Your heartfelt words to your girls were a pleasure to read. They are lucky to have you!

pinkalishious said...

fantastic page, is that wood grain stamps too?? beautiful title! x x

theelfqueen said...

Oh Sasha... this is a fab layout and you're so amazing -- thank you for sharing the real things in your heart.

Kellee Wynne Conrad said...

I feel the same way. Paralized at times over my own mortality. Sometimes I wish I could get it out of my head so I wouldn't feel crazy already...Thank-you for sharing and making us all feel "normal!"

NinaSt said...

Your layout is amazing! I can understand your fears. I think all moms can understand that.

marcy said...

I totally hear you Sasha.... that's one of the main reasons we don't go anywhere without our kids... they might become orphans! LOL

Christa said...

I love this layout! And have a secret love affair with those kraft stickers too!
I have to say that that is probably my biggest fear too-leaving my girls before they can take care of themselves.

Kelly said...

Absolutely love your beautiful page Sasha. I can totally relate to your fears. I think that would be true for all mums xxx

Diana Waite said...

I hear ya on the fears-sounds familiar to me....LOVE this layout--SO fun!

Ashley said...

Beautiful Sasha!

5littlechickens said...

Beautiful layout and sentiment, i know exactly how you feel :) we would do anything in the world to protect our children.

nailgirl said...

i completely share your worries and fears sasha! i just keep praying faithfully! anyway, i love your layout, as always. you do such a great job stitching!! going to have to try this more often. take care!

Kimber-Leigh said...

this is gorgeous sasha! (i'm loving that stamp!!!) and those alphas. i had no idea they existed. thanks for sharing!

Coochies & All said...

I also say the same prayer - that I can be around for them till they can take care of themselves, once that is done, I pray that I will go first. :))
elaine t

Ranjini said...

Hi Sasha, happened by your blog this evening by way of another one. Thanks for writing this - your fears (especially the very first one about your lovely girls) mirrors mine exactly. Love your beautiful LO too!

Zarah said...

Oh darling, how I LOVE your LOs!!
...and your lovely, sweet posts. Thank you for being such an honest, adorable person!

Julie Tucker-Wolek said...

I loveeeeeee your post....and can soooooooooo relate!! I love love love your lo too!!! GORGEOUS!! I loveeeeeeee the title and the tags! :):):):):):):):):):):)

Susan said...

So pretty! Your fears are totally normal. I remember feeling this way when my 21 year old was a baby. Now I'm just thankful she's old enough to take care of our 4 year old if anything should happen....it's hard being parents sometimes!

Diana said...

How do you do it? Create such beautiful pages over and over again? This is so lovely.
I have those fears too... that's the worst thing about having kids -- you never have true peace of mind again... .